There often is a mix of anxiety and excitement when it comes to deciding on whether you want to have another baby. Thinking back to when you first decided to start a family, the decision was perhaps an easier one to make because you didn’t REALLY know what you were getting into. But experience teaches you things. Adding to your family can sometimes be a harder decision to make. I want to address the anxieties you may be facing that could affect your decision to have another baby.
The idea of bringing home another baby might have you asking these questions. . .
Is our house big enough?
Let’s start with the practical side of things. The space families live in can either be a place of harmony and comfort or it can be a source of stress. You may be worrying about whether the home you currently live in is the right size for growing your family. Keep in mind, more is not necessarily better. Simplicity and order can go a long way even in the smallest of places. This article provides some great inspiration on how to minimize your anxiety about your home-space by maximizing the space in your home efficiently through simple tips. A lot of this is your mind-set. Remember, there are plenty of happy families in other cultures who live in much tighter spaces than we can even imagine here in the USA.
What about our car? Can we fit TWO car seats in the back?
Certainly another practical consideration. Is the vehicle reliable? Can we even afford to upgrade? If you determine you really do need to look into up-grading to a newer or bigger vehicle, sometimes facing the facts of the matter head on can be effective in combatting these gnawing anxieties. Do some research. You might take a look at a website like Auto.loan just to see what your options are.
What if my last pregnancy was difficult?
There is no hiding from the fact that some pregnancies and births can be traumatic or problematic and this can be a huge deciding factor on whether you want to go through it all again. It is important to understand that not every pregnancy and birth will be the same as the last, but it might be that you have some unresolved emotions attached to it that could need addressing first. Especially if you associate fear with it. My colleague Andrea Crafton, LPC is a Mama Coach at Mamas Blooming who specializes in helping women all over the USA recover from the emotional scars of last pregnancy and create an entirely new and better experience the second time around.
I’m afraid I won’t be able to get pregnant again or may miscarry.
The worry about facing infertility challenges is a real one and many women don’t want to go through the medical process again. Andrea Crafton, LPC has natural ways of helping women with fertility. It isn’t always smooth sailing and for some it takes longer than others. Also, if you have experienced pregnancy loss along the way, or you have a fear of this happening anxiety can definitely get in the way. You may and your partner may need emotional support through the process and relationship coaching or counseling can be a very helpful resource.
Is my first child ready to have a sibling?
You and your partner may have been happy with your decision but what about your first child? Is she ready to be a big sister? It might be worth talking about your plans with your child and monitor her reaction. You might consider how well adjusted she is in school and with her peers. If along the way it becomes evident she needs her own support you might consider having her see a play therapist who can help her adapt and adjust as well as help her navigate her anxiety or other emotions through the power of play.
Deciding to bring home another baby is a big and important decision. While it is natural to have a mix of emotions including levels of anxiety, know that there is plenty of support available to you and make the effort to reach out and speak with a professional to aid you in your process. If I can be of service, I have a few parenting coaching appointments available and I can provide referrals to other professionals as appropriate as well.